When you’re boldly going where no man (or woman) has ever gone before, it might be a wise idea to make it a solo adventure. You can still have a lot of fun on your own. Plus, it’s probably smart to test the waters of anal pleasure on your own first before you actually let someone else poke around there.
We hear all these stories about youngsters being sexually adventurous and trying out different things. And, consequently, getting a horror story of a lifetime that they might share at parties or at their therapy sessions (depending on how self-aware they are). However, some teen anal stories are so scary that they leave the rest of us wondering, “Why would I even want to try this?”
Well, let’s not get hasty. Solo anal play can be quite pleasurable if we pace ourselves and dance to the beat of our own drum, so to speak. When it comes to that anal sex toy you bought but were too scared to try out, here’s why it’s an excellent idea to take it for a solo test drive.
Solo Anal Play 101
Now, don’t get us wrong. We aren’t against trying out anal play with a partner. However, anal penetration is a big deal. You have to find a position that feels good, the right tool (try it with a finger before jumping to butt plugs or anal beads), and generally, figure out what feels comfortable and what doesn’t.
To do that, we have to either clearly communicate discomfort to our partner and tell them what to do or just trust ourselves while we do it solo. So, although you might be tempted to tell your partner to try slipping one in while they are performing oral sex, stop and think about it for a moment.
The anus is exceptionally delicate. It has a massive number of nerve endings that can provide the purest form of ecstasy. However, they can also quite easily cause a lot of pain. The anus is a sphincter and, thus, isn’t really designed to be a two-way street. Thus, breaching it will take some effort and a lot of consideration.
Trusting someone else to do that for us might cause us some (or a lot of) pain. When we do it ourselves, we can take the time to figure out what feels good (and what definitely doesn’t) and if we actually like anal play or not. What’s more, trying anal solo will help us direct our partner later.
Solo vs. Partnered Anal Play
When you’re first trying out anal, you’re in for some surprising sensations. There’s really no way of describing what anal feels like to someone who hasn’t tried it. What’s more, there’s no way of knowing if you’ll like it or no. So just dive in (if you’re interested).
Solo play allows us plenty of room for experimentation. We can try out different positions without feeling self-conscious about the way we look. If we’re wasting a lot of our mental energy thinking whether we look sexy enough for our partner, we won’t have enough to actually focus on the task at hand, which is figuring out the exact position that will make anal feel comfortable and pleasurable.
However, more importantly, solo anal play allows us to stop at any time we feel even the slightest discomfort. Of course, when asked, our partners would stop immediately (if they don’t, they are jerks, and they have no business doing anything, let alone anal with you). Still, solo play gives us more control over the entire situation.
Best Anal Toy for Solo Play
When you’re trying out anal play for the first time, you have to have the right mindset. Take a deep breath and prepare yourself for what’s to come. Gather the essentials — lube, (preferably water-based lube, although silicone lubes aren’t a bad choice either), an anal sex toy (with a flared base, of course), and the right attitude.
Always start by testing yourself. Try massaging the anus with your fingers to see if you even like the sensation. Relax and feel everything out. Trying out anal is best during a regular masturbation session. The more aroused you are, the better.
Of course, you don’t really need anal sex toys. It’s best to start with one (well-lubed) finger. However, sex toys come in handy because they are specifically designed for anal penetration (unlike your cuticles and nails, which may hurt you).
Explore the Wild World of Anal Sex Toys
When you’re a beginner, your best bets are extra small anal sex toys. Even if they seem too tiny, trust us — they aren’t. You can always work your way up to deep anal toys of massive proportions if you so choose. But for now, stick to small butt plugs and tiny anal beads. If you’re feeling particularly adventurous (and you have a prostate), you can try out small, curved vibrators and prostate massagers. The essential thing (and we know we sound like a broken record here) is to start small.
There is a massive number of anal sex toys out there. What’s more, they come in all shapes and sizes (and materials!). Small butt plugs (and even anal training kits) will allow you to ease the toy in without feeling too stuffed. Always pick one with a flared base because you don’t want to have to fish the toy out when your anus sucks it in (or have an emergency doctor do it for you).
Anal beads might be an even better choice for beginners. They are a bit harder to manipulate than butt plugs, given that they have more flexibility to them. However, small beginner beads have a tiny starting bead, which might feel more comfortable than a plug. Choosing the best anal toy is easier than you think. They are widely available from physical stores as well as online stores like lovegasm. You can always sort through categories, read their product descriptions, sizes, and how they are used as recommended by the website for maximum pleasure.
A Few Parting Words
Solo anal play might be the best time of your life — if you do it correctly. The more we know about our bodies, the more pleasurable any sex act will be (solo or with a partner). So dare to explore and give yourself the best orgasm you had so far!